Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Without hope,

  I'm feeling like I spent the whole day moping, silently. I don't know what has come over me, the optimistic, happy me which had a beacon of hope burning in her.
  Now, I just feel like burning all the bridges I've ever built, burning them all down till all that's left is ash and rise again from that, like a phoenix. I'm a phoenix, I have magic, I am whatever I believe myself to be, and no one has any control over me.
  Now, I just feel like I'm waiting to implode.

   I know you can't save me. And it doesn't matter.

  It's like no matter how hard I try...but I still won't give up.

  Do you know? I have no loves now, no infatuation, no feelings for anyone (except my inspirations and those whom I love -but not in that way) and I don't get butterflies in my stomach anymore -I hate how the English teachers at my school make English phrases sound so lame after they explain them that I despise using them. Ugh.
  The only love of mine are my dreams. They are the only thing that make life worth living on for. Well, though I have little loves too.

  Ok, whoever's reading this, you don't need to take it too seriously. I'll snap out of it pretty soon.

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